This is a cold B2B email I recently received from Gloria. While her details have been masked, this is a genuine email from my inbox.

Let’s break it down starting with the subject line:

Danielle, f*ck cold emails.

Bold opener, Gloria! Especially since I have no clue who you are.

I certainly didn’t expect this subject line nor did I sign up to receive your emails, but I appreciate how you seem to know my stance on cold emails.

Personalizing the subject with my first name is a nice touch. However, let’s be honest—most emails I open don’t lead with my first name in the subject line. I see what you’re doing here; it’s a classic personalization tactic that doesn’t necessarily work for everyone!

Curiosity got the best of me with the f-bomb, so I did open based on the subject line. 

Your email address looks legitimate, but just to double-check, I visited your website domain, and it appears to be non-functional. Not surprising, considering the information in your signature lacks a website or a link to your professional profile. 

Hmm, feels a bit “phishy.”

I’ll keep going, though, because this email could serve as a great case study for sales and marketing teams and what to consider when sending cold emails and how trust can be perceived—or not.

Hey Danielle,
I understand you receive random pitches daily that you don’t care about. I’m right there with you.

Gloria, this is indeed a random pitch, and you’re essentially telling me I shouldn’t care about it. But let me guess—your next line will explain why this pitch is different, right?

But this is worth a 12-second read…

Alright, timer set! Let’s see how you’re going to wow me with what you’re selling.

We help Advertising Agencies plan, script, film (with a female creator), and edit ads in just 5 days. Female appearances are outperforming and are going crazy right this second, and the top agencies know it.

Let’s unpack this:

• I’m guessing “Advertising Agencies” is a data point you’re using because it aligns with my company type. That’s some personalization—not terrible.
• You offer a lot of services completed in just five days, but what kind of ads are we talking about? Do you have any examples? Remember, you reached out to me; I may or may not know who you are, and you’ve given me nothing to help with my own research. I don’t blindly trust everything that comes through my inbox.
• Are you emphasizing “female creator” and “female appearance” because I’m a woman? It feels like you believe gender is a key decision factor for me.
• Saying that the top agencies know about female appearances makes me think you’re trying to create FOMO. Here’s the thing: if you had done your research, you’d know that the agency I work with has an award winning video production division that features some amazing creators.

No more long two week planning or filming yourself. We’ll handle it wholly, making it quicker and cheaper than you ever imagined…with a woman’s touch lol.

Actually, I don’t film as part of my role.

It’s great that you can do it quicker and cheaper with a “woman’s touch,” but honestly, I don’t care about the gender of the person doing the work. I thought we got past the gender references in the previous sentences.

Danielle, reply back with “Info” for info.

Does this tactic work, Gloria?

You could have provided me with the info upfront instead of making me respond to get it.

Thanks,

Gloria
Founder
Company
Phone
Address

Send back “Stop” if you want me to kick rocks. No harm, no foul.

Asking me to “send back ‘Stop’” isn’t the same as giving the option to unsubscribe. Where did you pick up this bad practice? You shouldn’t have emailed me in the first place, as I didn’t give consent. 

“Kicking rocks” should be the least of your concerns, given that this inbox solicitation is falling short line by line.

I’m sure I am going to get a second email from you Gloria, since that seems to be the trend with these unsolicited cold sales emails that are a favorite for sales outreach.

So I’ll see you in the same place in 2-3 days I’m guessing.